Munchie’s End

Many people are lamenting the demise of the Hostess empire and specifically the end of the Twinkie in light of corporate decision to close all Hostess bakeries in response to contract difficulties between the company and the union.  I’m not going to beat the anti-union drum about how out-dated unions are, nor am I going to rail against “the man” in the form of greedy executives who put their bottom line in front of the public good.  There is plenty of blame to go around.  The real victims here are the Twinkie-munching public.  The fans of the yellow cream-filled sponge cake that got many a college student through cramming for finals as well as the late night post-party munchies as well as the many late-night pregnancy cravings of expectant mothers are the faces of the suffering masses who will have to turn to Zingers–that sorry substitute–to sate their desires.
When I was in my twenties, I managed to survive on a Twinkie and Dr. Pepper diet for almost a year.  It was a running gag in the family.  If I had to run to the convenience store for any reason–gas in the car, diapers, paper towels, whatever–I would come back with a smudge of Hostess’ cream filling on my lip and tell-tale yellow crumbs on my shirt while finishing off my Dr. Pepper.  More than once, I forgot the real reason for the trip, so enthralled was I with my golden treasure.
Now, I haven’t had a Twinkie in perhaps six or more months.  They have gotten pretty expensive, and I couldn’t see spending 1 buck and a half or two bucks on the yummy snacks.  It was fine when I could get the pair for 50 cents, but anything more and that 25-cent nutty bar or Swiss cake roll from Little Debbie looked awfully good.  I have, on occasion, splurged and bought some, but usually when they were on sale.
I looked for some this weekend, wanting to relive the sugar rush of my youth, but alas, none were to be found.  The stores have already begun reducing the shelf space and since none are being restocked, if they are gone, they are truly gone.  I heard that eBay was filled with people auctioning Twinkies, cupcakes, Ding Dongs and Ho Hos at insane prices.  That is sad.  Of course, I could say that the writing was on the wall.  I think it was a mistake to stop wrapping the Ding Dong in foil.  It was a mistake to change the name in some markets to King Dons.  What’s a King Don?  I’ll tell you what it isn’t.  It isn’t chocolately, cream-filled goodness, that’s what it isn’t.  And of course, the Ho Ho was fighting an uphill battle against the Swiss Roll and Little Debbie was playing to win by undercutting Hostess’ prices.  I figure now that Hostess has surrendered, the price of Little Debbies will skyrocket.  So Hostess did some missteps and it cost all of us.
I did read that in all likelihood, Hostess will sell their recipes to another bakery and the Twinkie will live on–albeit under another banner.  One can only hope.  May Twinkie the kid ride again.


Leave a comment

Filed under Humor, Society

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s